Many parents are lost when their once affectionate and friendly child is increasingly in response to the most innocuous remarks and questions can clap the door, tend and snap. "What happened?! Why does he behave like that? Did I miss something in his upbringing?! " - Almost every mom is asked by these questions. Let's try to figure out what is the rudeness in the behavior of adolescents.

Features of the transition period

First of all it is worth mentioning about age features Transitional age: in the period from 10-11 to 16-17 years old, a rapid restructuring of the body occurs. The peak of emotional instability falls on 11-13 years old in boys and 13-15 years old in girls.

The leading activities at this age is intimate-personal communication with peers. Teens develop and know the world through the prism of communicating with each other: they quarrel, lay down, fall in love, communicate.

Parents who survived the "Crisis of Three Years" from their children probably remember how the baby stretched to independent and refused to accept adult help. The teenage crisis is very similar to this time, because adolescents, like three years, are torn to independence and independence and do not recognize their weakness and inexperience where objectively cope with the situation is unable. Only here three years can be lifted to the hands and carry, give a favorite toy or distract the game, and with a teenager such a focus will not pass. A teenager can not only be heated, pour, but also offended and even escape from the house.

Why are adolescents rude?

Hormonal restructuring of the body.

Everyone knows that hormones produced by our organism are directly related to the mood. This is especially true for women and adolescents. In transition, a real hormonal explosion occurs, which often causes adolescents completely unpredictable behavioral reactions. Most often teenagers and they themselves are not happy to have nahamili, but they really could not manage their emotions at that moment.

Conflict fathers and children.

No matter how much it wanted to preserve trust relationships with your child, generation conflicts are inevitable. First of all, because it is necessary for the development of the child. A teenager requires independence and independence than often provokes parents for prohibitions. The rest of the confrontation begins, through which the teenager studies the borders of the permissible, its own capabilities and resources.

Negative example.

What is sin, many adults allow themselves rude behavior. Teenagers are watching movies where there is a rudeness, read books with obscene brand, and if the parents allow themselves to be rudely talking in the presence of a child or even allow rude to his address, there is nothing surprising that he begins to behave the same way. And although in adolescence, the prestige of the parent falls sharply, an example of mother and father still remains one of the most important in the child's life.

Low ability to self-control.

Due to the lack of experience, age and some individual characteristics, the common problem in adolescents is the lack of self-regulation skills. Teenagers are impulsive: they first do, and then think, not always aware of the consequences of their actions. Self-control, like any other skill, must be trained since childhood.

Read also

Development of self-control in a teenager

What to do with rudeness teenager

How to minimize the rudeness of a teenager?

All parents are trying to correct the behavior of the teenager, and, indeed, it is amenable to correction, although not one hundred percent.

Install clear boundaries of permissible behavior, discuss them with a teenager and make sure that he understood them correctly. Is it possible to build a displeased grimace, clap the doors, throw things, call? Each family is individually suited to solving this issue, but it is important that all its members follow these rules.

Respect the child's right to a bad mood, negative emotions, unwillingness to speak, the need for privacy. Teenage age - a period when the world has only two colors - black and white, and black prevails. Agree that the teenager, so that you do not touch it for a while and gave him the opportunity to go and think, enough to tell you: "Mom, I have a bad mood - I want to be alone and listen to music."

Avoid rudeness yourself. Do not call the child, do not diminish the significance of his experiences and feelings, do not be rude in response to His rudeness. If you have lost control and nahamila's child, sincerely apologize to him.

Tell a teenager about your experience in the transitional crisis. Surely you remember how it also seemed to you that the world collapses and no one understands you. Share with a teenager, what feelings and emotions you have experienced how to experience your experience. Do not say "I know what you feel", because you really don't know this. Just tell us about similar experience and support a teenager.

In conflict situation, do not lead a dialogue on elevated colors. If the teenager is sprayed and shouts, say: "I can't talk to you in such a tone - let us both calm and then continue." It can pass literally a few minutes - the child will calm down and will be ready to lead a dialogue again.

If the grubean offended you or called, do not appreciate it, but tell me about your feelings: "You are a wonderful person! I love you very much, but now I really hurt such words from you. " The dialogue on the sensory level is the key to mutual understanding with a teenager.

Develop a Tinewner self-control, if rudeness has become a frequent guest in your home. There are many trainings for teenagers specializing in the development of self-regulation skills. It's great if you have the opportunity to visit a psychologist and offer a teenager to visit such training - they really help. If there is no such possibility, do home yourself. To begin with a simple game from childhood "Yes / No Do not say, black / white do not take." She perfectly trains self-regulation skills: the teenager has to control the said and be more attentive. You can further complicate, add movements to ensure that the control is also behavioral.

Roughness - the problem is complex, the formation of which is affected by many factors. In the aggregate, they give a negative behavioral reaction, which can and should be adjusted.

Be careful to growing children, love them, appreciate and enjoy the opportunity to observe their rapid development!

We all faced with rude words to their address. It happens that a person completely unreasonably behaves hostile towards us, and it often knocks us out of the gauge. We are not even affected by the fact of a hostile reaction, but the fact that we do not understand what they deserve it.

Let's see for a start, what is rudeness?

Roughness are words or actions that are demonstratively hostile towards us.

The keyword here is "demonstratively". A person does not just show hostility, but also wants it to be obvious and to us, and others.

Immediately it is worth noting that people do nothing just like that. Any behavior has a reason and hidden goal. If a person shows a demonstrative hostility, it means that he is waiting for some reaction from us. Or a person wants to "sell" us, or, for some reason, cause response hostility. It is impossible to give a provocator what he wants from you.

The question arises: why does a person want to provoke us to hostility? It should be noted that people do not always understand the root causes of their actions themselves. As a rule, people provoke others onto the overpass to demonstrate their superiority. Why a person it is necessary - a separate question.

The worst thing that can be done in such a situation is to start playing by the rules of the provocateur. If we start to be sad in response, then we begin to play on its "territory". As soon as we sank to this level, we start playing with him on an equal footing. Prior to this, we have the power of society, the norms of decency, morality and morality. While we are not starting to be sad in response, we are allegorically standing in the fortress, around which some kind of barbarian runs, who throws mud. He is just ridiculous.

It is unlikely that such verbal sword in our interests. Why do we fight on equal, when we have an advantage? The best way to response to such a situation is calm and polite behavior.

It may seem that in this way we show some weakness. Not really. Thus, we continue to maintain control over the situation. While we are calm, the initiative in our hands, our position from above. If we do not have a goal to win Grubian, you can simply smile on all of his attacks, and ultimately calm it, perhaps even causing sympathy from his part.

Causes of rude behavior

Why not be carried on rudeness? First of all, because we do not know its reasons. Perhaps a person does not want to be rude to you, but simply does not know the norms of behavior. In this case, there is no point in responding negatively. You can just tactfully tell him that his words are unpleasant for you.

In addition, a person can simply be sad because he has an exhausted nervous system. Specifically, he has nothing against you, just his words and intonation is consonant with its inner state. You can not immediately know this, so it is worth it to give a person a chance to adjust your behavior, perhaps he just did not have time to restructure after a difficult situation for him.

Often people are rude from fatigue. People are losing self-control due to lack of mental strength. It is worth considering and try to forgive man.

With these reasons, 95% of gross behavior is explained. They break out a banal request to talk with you differently.

What to do with 5% of completely unbearable people?

The best way out is to stop with such people any communication. If you decide that a person is not replenished, it is better to protect him immediately.

If you are rustling in in some institution, you should inform the leadership of this person, or just start using the services of another institution. If this is a "close" person, then perhaps you should think about separate accommodation. There is no point in establishing relationships with people who do not respect us at all.

You can resort to another tactic. Keeping composure and reasonable look, you can ask for help from others. It's one thing - to tear only to you, but completely different - to contact the group. As a rule, it helps perfectly.

It is best to simply not allow such people in your life.

Parents teach their children politely belong to other people. The guys are given the rules of cultural behavior: not to handle the elders, respectfully handle the younger. But, unfortunately, not all people follow such recommendations. For some rudeness - this is the main way to prove its right thing to another person. With this situation, you can meet anywhere: in transport, in the store, at work. Rough words are deeply wounded, and you will not always imagine that answer the offender. And the mood is spoiled for all day. So that no such situations happen should be to know

What are the reasons?

Rudeness is a special desire to act, in a word to insult the interlocutor or others. At the same time, it is based on irresponsibility and anonymity. If Hama ask his position, place of work, surname, the tonality of his conversation will change significantly.

It is thanks to impunity, rudeness thrives. Previously, with an unpleasant appeal, the person came across the store, at work, in some public places. Today, with an increase in the number of cars and the expansion of social networks, unworthy behavior meets more and more.

To know how to react to rudeness, it should be understood what causes its reasons. So, psychologists believe that gross behavior is characteristic of the following categories of people:

1. Persons who have not received enough love in childhood. In this case, a person is trying to notice him. After all, he is all the time experiencing a shortage of attention, love, communication. These are people who did not praise in childhood, did not give time to communicate with them. After all, each child needs love and understanding of the parents. Not getting the necessary caress and warmth in the usual, natural way, the baby resorts to rude, terrible behavior. And at this time, parents are doing the desired - react to it, begin to indulge in it. This method in the consciousness of the child is formed as the only way to attract attention. Accordingly, in an adult life, a person continues to use it.
2. People seeking self-affirmation. Such a picture is observed if the interlocutor cannot adequately answer. In this case, Grubian rises in their own eyes and with even greater force continues to humiliate a person. So he tries to assert themselves. Often, this situation is developing if Grubian is the boss who even has a minimum power or Ham for certain reasons causes a fear of the interlocutor.
3. State of despair, disappointment, fatigue. In such a situation, even cultural man can break and shank. Of course, the following apologies followed. And here it all depends on what the culture of behavior at the interlocutor. A brought up man will apologize and the conflict will be settled. But if the collision happened with Ham, it will already be on the platoon. No apologies here will help.

In addition, Khambia can bring inability to clearly argue their arguments. Sometimes you can observe the following picture when two people argue. The first leads specific evidence confirming its point of view. The other, being sure of its right thing, cannot argue it, but seeks to go to the dispute to the end. Often in such a situation, without having good arguments, he breaks down and moves to rudeness. And, as a rule, Fiasco suffers. At the same time, in the eyes of others, this person demonstrates how low the culture of behavior has.

Hama on the road

Any driver knows that there are normal and inadequate participants in the track on the track. The second category includes those who cut, rebuilding from one row to another, requires to immediately skip, signals without a reason, constantly flashes with distant light or crave to figure out and prove, sometimes even with the help of fists, its right point.

How to react to rudeness? And in what language to communicate with the road jubian? Unfortunately, universal instructions do not exist. Since inadequate situations are always unpredictable. However, psychologists recommend adhere to certain rules. Their observance will allow not only to reduce rudeness on the roads, but in some situations to protect life.

How to behave in difficult situations? Psychologists give the following recommendations:

1. Inattentive driver. Sometimes there is such a situation that the green light comes on, and all the cars are worth it for one participant in motion. The driver was distracted or thought, and simply did not notice how the traffic light switched. People who are in a hurry begin desperately signal. This is a simple situation, but it is very annoying. If you ended up as a "sleeping" driver, the best thing you can do is to say thank you to those who have been signaling you. Once in the role of an impatient driver, try to "wake up" softer. For example, frog away with distant light. Thus, the fight against rude must begin with you. Stay on the road always adequate.
2. Save time. Not only nerves, but also precious hours are spent on the proceedings with the Burent. Two drivers who are not inferior to each other on a narrow road are very reminded by rams from a children's fairy tale. If you do not like this comparison, give way to the opponent. At the same time, calm themselves by the fact that, unlike him, go perfectly with reverse. In addition, I sincerely smile at Hama, and the wonderful mood will be provided for all day.
3. Uncontrollable situation. If the meetings with an inadequate driver could not be avoided, know that you won't find a common language with him. Therefore, it is best to cook carefully. Close the windows and doors, turn on the video recorder or a mobile phone in the car. So you can fix illegal actions performed on your address. Do not attempt yourself to explain something to the brazen driver. It can be very easy to break out and put into the course of brew agents, fists. But subsequently prove that you acted as part of self-defense, difficult. It is best to try to attract the attention of those around the coup or accident. You can call the police or loved ones.
4. Removing stress. After meeting with an inadequate driver, there is always an unpleasant feeling in the shower. Psychologists recommend calling native people and tell about what happened to you. Simply complain. Having received support and understanding of a loved one, you quickly get rid of the negative and can safely continue the movement.
5. Related rest. Sometimes you yourself can experience irritation at the sight of other participants in the movement. If everyone around is perceived as riders or do not know how to drive drivers, you need to rest a little. In such a situation, it is very important to fulfill the following advice of the psychologist. Exit the car on fresh air. Make 10 squats. If this discharge did not help, then do a dozen exercise.

Roughness at work

Unfortunately, today it is not uncommon. Rude at work on the part of the boss is very often found. "Sacrifice" often tries not to pay attention to the gross leaderships. After all, make a comment to a higher colleague without negative consequences for yourself is not always possible.

Of course, it is impossible to constantly not pay attention to unpleasant statements. However, how to stop the rudeness of the chief? In certain situations, if the behavior of the leadership or statements go beyond the norms permissible (framework established by law), such persons can be involved in the court.

But often the rudeness of the manual is manifested in constant ignoring. In general, elevated tones are used, derogatory intonation is used. Sometimes the subordinate feels dismissive attitude. In such situations, it will not be possible to bring to legal responsibility of the Grubian. It is better to apply the recommendations of psychologists.

Rudeness or constructive criticism?

But before using the advice of a psychologist, it should be carefully understood in a situation. Some people, as a result of their emotional anxiety, can perceive criticism as rudeness. In this case, they lose very valuable and important information about themselves.

How to distinguish rudeness and insult from constructive criticism? The answer is very simple. Rudeness is aimed at destruction of psychological integrity and prevents further development. Criticia allows you to restore individuals. She motivates to improve.

How to behave at work?

If the Ham's handling of subordinates is a guide style, it is best to treat him philosophically. After all, it simply trains your exposure.

In such situations, the following psychologist advice will help:

1. Respond mechanically manual: "I will do everything," "you are right."
2. You can honestly admit that you are lost from the scream. The main thing, do not go to the smart tone. Otherwise, the boss will think that you are kidding him.
3. Tell your chief, which value Him. Therefore, you want to understand why he is angry, and discuss it in a relaxed atmosphere. Such behavior is simply disarming the fun.

Many people are trying to resist the Grebian. At the same time, they make mistakes that are still more than They cause rudeness, the rudeness of the boss in response. Consider them:

1. Justification. Such behavior resembles a child. In addition, justification is the recognition of guilt. In addition, humble enough. This situation will only raise the manual. Remember: justification is not needed by anyone, they do not want to hear and do not wait.
2. Rudeness in response. Very easy to get involved in the scandal. In this case, the boss will even get more than expected. The only exception may be a vigorous response replica Ostrovna.
3. Silence. It is often perceived as dismissive ignoring. This behavior causes even greater aggression. Be sure to answer. At the same time, keep cold, polite tone. Answer little. And then you can silence.
4. Interrupting bosses. Be sure to give the chief to speak. And just waiting for pauses, answer.

Rudeness in the store

Very often, rudeness comes from incompetent other people's people. They are trying to emphasize their significance in this way and increase the status. At perfect should not be taken seriously. And even more so worry about this.

Of course, it is very difficult to restrain if you hear public insults in the store. The rudeness of the sellers puts in an unpleasant position.

So, if you encountered rudeness in the store, how to react to rudeness? Tips for psychologists allow you to adequately come out of the situation:

1. Universal phrases. Hearing the seller rudeness, it is necessary to answer him, leading the facts that cannot be challenged. At the same time, use common phrases: "People are different. They live in different ways. They are interested in a variety of things. Different events cause various reactions. " An excellent example illustrating how to use such phrases is the following. Rudeness of the seller: "What do you smell the tomatoes with dirty fingers?". Answer: "Pights of tomatoes different people Check in different ways. "
2. Contact to higher authorities. If the seller begins to make you rude, it is regarded as an encroachment on your rights. It is absolutely useless to answer him the same. This is an extra spending of energy and strength. But how to protect yourself from rudeness? It is better to clarify the manager who is the leader and contact him with a complaint. It is impossible to leave rudeness unpunished. You can demand a book of complaints and describe the situation in it.

1. Try not to let the Grubian seize control over the situation being generated. Regardless of what is the status of your opponent, you have the right to demand respect for yourself. Let it understand the pinch.
2. How to respond to rudeness, if Grubian is so passionate about his game, which completely loses control? In this case, put it in place. Try to temper the fervor of this person. Negative emotions should not be accumulated. Otherwise, you will throw out their homes at home and loved ones. In addition, many Grubians completely believe in impunity. Try to dispel this myth. However, do not follow the damn item, do not lose control. Otherwise, you go down to the level of an uncompatible person. Your "performance" should not be understood. Do not swing your hands or scream loudly.
3. All negative phrases do not accept anything. Just symplaze Grabian. Such a person is dissatisfied with life. Therefore, he deserves pity. Especially descending to rudeness has a weak character. Consequently, how can you perceive seriously its insults? Fully ignore all the negative, which sounded to your address.
4. Respond to rudeness by humor. Try to joke over a person attempts to offend or humiliate you. You can even smile in response to arrogance. By this you will understand Grabian, that his comments are indifferent to you. Your echidial smile will provoke a storm of indignation. Just settle in the face of such a person. He will understand that the defeat suffered, and did not cause you a negative reaction in response. You can "finish" the opponent with such phrases: "Something hurt you?", "Why did you eat so much?". Try that the last word is left for you.
5. Show pity. Grubian is fueled by the energy of the conflict. Therefore, polite, smart and completely adequate person, having heard rudeness, will not answer the same. He ignores such an appeal. An excellent way to suppress the negative is to regret such a person. Do not forget that often such people in childhood from their parents did not receive proper upbringing and care. They are usually unsuccessful in life. They do not like the opposite sex. They deserve compassion. Therefore, your non-standard attitude towards the situation will completely destroy the plans of the energy vampire to "fit" experiences and nerves.
6. Include your fantasy. If Grubian expresses you in the face of everything he thinks, try to imagine that this person is behind the glass. You do not hear what he says. This technique is quite funny tactics. After all, you see how Grubian moves his lips, waving his hands, but do not catch a single word.
7. Talk to man. Sometimes there are such situations where to ignore, and even more so it is impossible to ridiculously. This applies to communicating with close, friends, familiar, colleagues. In such cases, it is better to frankly talk to a person. Try to find out what happened to him today, as his health. You will understand than provoked such behavior. In addition, let Grubian look from the side of themselves and rethink unworthy communication.
8. Tune in to positive. Rudeness is a lot of people who have a negative worldview. So try to control your thoughts. Do not attract a disrespectful relationship.

And most importantly: be sure! Only such a model of behavior makes it possible to beautifully go out of any situation, while fully maintained your own dignity and do not feel the victim.

If you imagine that you are stuck on the island with a wildly hysterical dude, which yells on you not in the case and demands something all the time, then you probably would have given him a long time ago, so that he calmed down. The method is certainly not bad, but this type will not definitely calm down after your pill. Nasely postpone, let's think right. You need to save this man from the desire to be rude to you. It is not difficult if you know several rules:

1. Remember, sometimes you also have a rough

Maybe not this time, but Vanguham, which was exactly the case when you were wrong and rustled to your interlocutor. And this does not mean that you are a bad person. So the next time someone is roughly drawn with you, remember that he is the same as you. He just flared and it does not mean that now he is a hunger man.

2. Do not take it to your account (even if it is personal)

When someone is rude and especially if he goes to personality, then it hurts it. But you have a choice, you yourself can decide how to respond to such comments. Just understand for yourself that those personal insults that he splashing on you, in fact, is his problems. He is bad and he is trying to rehabilitate at the expense of your failures.

3. Find why

People have their own reasons for rudeness. Perhaps he had a bad day. Perhaps he does not even understand how rude he behaved. Why guess. You never recognize the exact reason until you ask him. Just quietly ask: "I think it is pretty rude. Why are you talking to me like that? "The answer may surprise you.

4. Be objective and analyzed

Think about why this man behaved like this? Was the meaning in this? What was the reason? So-so, you strain your gyruses that there is no weighty reason for such hysterics. Now you can ignore him with a satisfied smile. In those rare cases when logic is present easily destroy the root of the problem.

5. Do not marry the theater formulation

You can no longer be kept in your hands and feel that you are about to come to this ghoul. Do not. If you join this drama, it will only pump the setting. If you deal with the king / queen drama, which created this vessel specifically, then behave adequately. Do not allow rude behavior to provoke you.

6. Just go away

Rudeness is infinite, but if you find the strength and just dumped away from the epicenter of hysterical visa, then we will make your hand. This is the fastest and most reliable way to avoid smaller behavior and sporming the scandal. Get away, even if he still says something to you. Moreover, if this is a stranger, you will never have things with him again. If it is a friend or colleague, then soon he will understand that you should not talk rudely. In any case, a person will understand what he behaved wrong.

7. Offer help

Well, yes, most often rudeness is the result of an uncompaniment. Just sometimes a person who is rude does it because he is something disappointed. If in your power to help a person solve his problem, then offer your help. And soon instead of a meaningless silence from his mouth, the music of gratitude will begin.

8. Sometimes rudeness is a habit.

Some people behave simply because for them it is natural behavior. After the rudeness becomes a habit, it is already difficult to get rid of it. This man does not teach anything. This kind of rudeness does not need to be taken close to heart. It's just a template that is difficult to break.

9. Do not try to change a person

You can't make him be polite if he wants to be rude. In fact, he will behave even worse after such conversations. Sometimes the best option is to prove that for the reasons for his rudeness - there is no guilt. Now let him somehow solve this problem. It no longer concerns you.

10. Roughness against kindness

Do not allow rudeness to conquer your territory. The best way Get rid of gross behavior - to stay benevolent, thereby giving the other person to calm down. Soon his behavior will be the same as yours.

The main thing is that you yourself do not bother until you calm this type. He has every chance to infect you hysteria. But try to keep yourself in your hands, remember that you are above this miserable behavior. Real men remain calm at almost any circumstances.

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From situations where you intentionally insult or offend, there is a decent way out. As writer Mariam Petrosyan says: "There are many ways to send a person to hell, without resorting to open rudeness." It is worth familiar with them, so as not to be likened to the unprecedented individuals.

website He knows how to respond to Grabian, while not dropping to its level of intelligence and upbringing. That is smart and beautiful.

1. Save peace

The purpose of the attacks of Hama is to bring the other of the equilibrium and get a splash of negative energy. If you do - you lost. So you should not deliver such joy to this energy vampire. Keep yourself in your hands, do not let yourself stormy reactions and humiliating excuses. Speech is calm, relaxed and at the same time clear, solid. It discourselves the opponent and deprivates its capabilities to play on your emotions.

Example:the seller has no surrender, and he annoyed and angrily declares it. Do not go to the level of emotions after it. Concentrate on the essence of the problem. Quietly tell me that the presence of reproduction is the concern of the store, and should not shift this responsibility to the buyer, especially in such a brute form. In the case of an inadequate reaction, you can always write a complaint, contact the administrator or directly to the authorities.

2. Trying to understand

Imagine a hedgehog with spiny needles - a little frightened animal. Sprogize this image on Grubian: so you will take a patronage-indulgent position in relation to it. Now you can ask questions that will cool off his dust: pay attention to the causes of aggression, on its meaninglessness, that it is not related to the essence of the matter.

Example: "Did you get a difficult day?", "Do you want to offend me?" Why? "," What else do you have in the shower? "," Why do you behave like this? "," Why do you strive to look worse than you really do? " etc. Thinking over your questions, a person will understand all the absurdity of the situation.

3. Translate into constructive

If in the words of the offender there is a fair, but clothed in an unsightly form of criticism, then hooked for rational grain. Tell me that you appreciate his point of view on this issue: this reaction will show that the mind speaks into you, while Ham is guided by emotions. And to keep a meaningful dialogue - a much stronger and competent option. So much that even those who are alien to politeness, probably treat your words with respect.

Example:you were incorrectly parked by creating an inconvenience to another driver, and his reaction to it is extremely nervous. Just apologize and tell me that you will continue to carefully when choosing a parking site.

4. Point to a true face

Nobody loves the truth. therefore a good option - Shoot the focus of attention from yourself on a person who told you an unpleasant thing. In other words, show Hama his own reflection. The answer will be emotional, but at the same time you do not go down to the level of the scandalist. You can say directly, and it is possible - allegorically and metaphorically, with the use of fantasy.

Example: "Looks like you are just badly raised. There is nothing more to add there, "you always have it, what to say bad, right?", "What a pity that the pills from rudeness have not yet invented", "rudeness you absolutely not to face." Moreover, such phrases should be pronounced exceptionally calmly.

5. Shine wit

Humor and sarcasm find the glowing Hama surprise and cause him a feeling of awkwardness. The easiest option is to laugh in response. The highest pilot - self-irony, a quick witty response or even compliment to the opponent. And noticed: intending to say something bad, a person is strained and gaining air, and if you need to laugh, he will relax, and the gust of anger will disappear.

Example: Did you remember the story where you have failed? Laugh! Only strong people are capable of such. Does anyone come to you with charges? Bring the theses to the absurd, agreeing with them. For example, to remark "where are you? Do you see anything around? " Answer: "Yes, I do not see. It is strange that you did not notice: I really forgot my glasses at home today. " Or simply sarcastically tell me: "It almost hurt me."

6. Demonstrate courtesy

If on your way - chronic grubean, absolute politeness and limitless patience to help you. Smile and friendly communication - unusual format for people of a similar warehouse, and it can knock them out of the gauge. In addition, without receiving an assumed response alleged scenario, Grubian will lose interest in a surfacing. You will get a chance to take the situation in your hands.

Example:clothing store consultant is nervous: "Will you measure for a long time? It's time to decide. " Answer: "Please bring this model yet." If Ham is a strong nut, you can pronounce words a little louder than usual. It does not help? Or feel that unable to hold back? Stop an unpleasant conversation. So you do not go down to the scandal and at the same time show that you should not talk rudely. This is a universal method of psychological protection. Suitable for all types of aggression. Especially if you are a mentally unhealthy person or one, with whom there is no need to maintain communication.

Example:you denied the alms asocial character in a drunk. He shouts at you and threatens. Do not pay attention to go on your affairs. But ignore correctly. Not "emotion" within himself, as if silently swallowing offense, and keep the image of a successful personality, which is no time to dwell on annoying trifles.

Bonus: "I love you"

If you quarrel with your loved ones, it is possible to drop all psychological manipulations and just tell yourself: "Stop, enough." And he or her: "Yes, this question is important for me. But at the same time I, of course, love you. And I want to solve the problem, without spoiling our relationship. " Good and love in response to the negative will wander the anger, and you can find a way out of the situation that led to the conflict.