How to solve your problems yourself. Differences from the problem

There are several categories of people who are different in different ways:
Some closes the eyes to the problems and simply ignore them.
Others begin to honest and complain, in advance inspiring themselves that the problem arising is impossible to resolve.
And finally, the third collects all their will in his fist and try to solve the problem inserting a challenge.
The fact that belonging to the last category of people is easier to overcome difficulties, clearly and obviously. It is gratifying that belonging to any of the groups - the point is corrected. So, if you rather belong to the first or second category of people and it does not suit you, you can change it. What is needed for this? - Little patience and practice. Then you will find useful installations and absolutely concrete steps to constructive solving the problems of any degree of complexity.

Tip 1: Do not ask "I can ...", ask "how?" So what?"
Many people, facing difficulties, ask themselves:

can I do it?
is it possible to do this at all?
and will not be worse if I try to change something?
These thoughts can be understood. The harder task and the problem threateningly, the more doubt. We are not sure if we have enough strength and abilities in solving this problem.
In principle, thinking about the limits of one's own capabilities is not bad. Only when it comes to the moment when it is necessary to act, the activity of such people for some reason slows down or they simply lower their hands until the problem becomes difficult, which was not actually not.

Try to approach the problem on the other side. Not with the one that causes you feeling that you are standing in front of an irresistible wall, but with the one that opens the doors for various opportunities to solve a particular problem. Better ask yourself:

how do I better go?
what would I do to solve the problem?
what exactly do I need to solve the problem?
who or what can I help?
what could be the first step in solving the problem?
Although questions of this nature and do not solve the problem itself, but you still move in the right direction. And if you are more thinking about the possible ways of solving than about the limits of your opportunities, it will give you strength and will awaken the feeling that you can build and organize your own life.
If you constantly replace the thought "I can ..." on "How?" And "What?", You will have a good source base for an active problem solving.

Tip 2: Learn to find positive parties in your problems.
If we have some kind of problem, then we will surely wanted to postpone her for another day or forget about it. We consider problems as annoying and we want to get rid of them, like garbage. At the same time, we forget one thing: each problem constantly gives us the opportunity to grow as a person and study it.

Accordingly, a useful step to solve problems is to balance them as educational tasks and the desire to learn to love and solve these tasks. Probably, it is even less theoretically, which sounds - as in fact, every person makes it in certain areas of activity.

One, for example, who begins to study any sport or musical instrument, immediately faces great difficulties. People who look at another unattainable goal come into conflict with themselves and their abilities. They are unhappy that they are not so good, they spend a lot of energy on self-criticism. At the same time, they quickly pass the passion and they give up.

In a different way, those who love their work and trying to expand this love. Despite some failures and mistakes, they still enjoy learning and thus find strength for further struggle.

For the next solutions to the problems that seem very difficult to you, the following question setting can help you:

What is positive in this problem (for me or others)?
What will I learn from this problem (tasks)?
What experience I get, who would not get without solving this problem?
How long will my horizons and my abilities expand when solving this problem?

Tip 3: If you understand the essence of the problem, you will decide it half
Many people who do not understand with the problem often choose the wrong ways to solve it. As a result, these paths lead to a dead end, since they did not fit at all to the problem.
Suppose you have a conflict with a colleague for work. You ask yourself what is the actual problem and come to the assumption that your colleague is jealous of you because you get more money for the same work. And whatever measures you have accepted, they would not have led to the solution of the conflict, since hate in this case is not a problem, but a consequence.

And indeed, it is not easy to understand the essence of the problem. We willingly forget that problems have almost always several reasons and factors. Of course, it would be much easier if we were dealing with an unequivocal cause-consequence. As a rule, the problem is a system that includes various factors and actions.

Therefore, try to remember that most things are much more complicated than you appreciate them. This is a useful thought that protects against hasty and rapid decisions.

So, try to keep your thought that you already know exactly what the essence of the problem. Once again, start from the very beginning, feel the problem, take a look at it from different points of view, analyzing it in this way:

so I would describe the problem:
what besides this can still talk about:
and if you still think, you can come to that ...
who and what is involved (o) in the problem ...
what else could affect ...
that before it was already done to solve the problem, and what it led to ...

Tip 4: Be Open For Different Features
This Council is largely related to the Council No. 3. If you admit that problems are more complicated than it seems at first glance, it becomes easier to understand that, as a rule, it is not one of the only solution to solve the problem - and is definitely not the first one that it occurred to you.
The desire to quickly find a suitable solution to the problem is understandable. But it also quickly leads to focus on one possible solution path. In some cases, this can lead to nowhere and strengthen the problem. It often happened that people were so concentrated on the chosen decision path, which did not even notice that the problem was already performed at the intermediate stage.

you think about the problem much more intense;
you do not run too far in one direction, but remain mentally flexible;
almost you have different features, and you will not doubt if the selected path will lead to success.
So, do not close yourself for other ways to solve. Use creative methods for the invention of various ideas. Record all your idea, and even those that seem crazy - who knows, perhaps it is in them and the problem is lied.

Tip 5: courage to think creatively
This Council has already been partially used in the Council No. 4, but it is so important that it should be specifically rendered into a separate question.
So, "think creative" means to come to extraordinary ideas, to ideas that are often not understood or not accepted by others, as well as to have courage on crazy ideas and develop seeming false paths.

In one day, it is impossible to learn this, but still there are a number of aids, thanks to which you can start developing this quality, for example:

Ask people who do not have any idea about your problem, about their ideas. Often, even naive and rustic people come to the brilliant thoughts, which we ourselves could not come because of some prevailing ideas.
Just turn your problem. And ask instead of "What do I do to ensure that the relationship has become better?" - "What should I do that the relationships become worse?". Thanks to this, you see the problem in the new light. Though it sounds madness, but it is this way that people often come to ideas that could not find in the first question.
Give the will to your fantasies and associations. Formulate the problem in different ways. Open a dictionary or lexicon on any page and accidentally choose some term. It does not matter whether this term has the ratio to your problem. Record all all associations of communication of this term and your problem.
Please pay attention: workout is needed to come to a completely new thought. Do not expect from myself immediately too much, but just openly and curiously study this kind of thinking. And everything will work out!

When the problem, as if tsunami, covers with head. It may seem that this situation is single and standard solution methods are not suitable. This is partly true: other people's advice that generously spread colleagues, relatives or friends are often too generalized, therefore are not suitable for some particular case. We invite you to look at the solution of the problems otherwise: from our article you will learn five steps for which you can deal with any problem. We also tell about the four basic principles that you can apply to solve any problem situation.

Step 1: Clearly formulate your problem

A clear wording of the uranial problem is half of the success. Most people who say they have problems, will never be able to answer what exactly they conclude. For example, "I had problems in relationships" - too abstract wording, according to which it is impossible to determine what exactly you are not satisfied with the relationship. Try to specify the task so that you are easier to choose the method of solving it. Otherwise, you will have to try many ways before you find suitable. Perhaps you will need to focus: for you we have found a simple way, which will help you understand yourself and understand which party you need to approach the problem solving.

Step 2: Analyze your problem

You will be able to solve the problem faster and easier if you know for sure, because of what it originated. It is more effective to affect the root of the problem: if you are struggling with the consequences, and not with the reason, the result is hardly pleased with you. In this case, you can make an analogy with a disease: you will not be able to recover (or the process of recovery will delete) if you treat symptoms - for example, you take pills from dental pain instead of signing up to the dentist. It is clear that this approach not only does not save you from the problem, but also aggravate it. Analysis of the situation will help you both in the present, and in the future: if you understand, for what reason the problem situation arose, you can avoid it in the future.

Step 3: Understand that you you can make to solve the problem

If you want to solve the problem, first you will need to decide on your own. It is advisable to fix them on paper and make a list: even the most endless possibilities may seem insignificant and small, if you do not notice them. Break up to make a list of what you can do to solve the problem that has arisen, and then place it for a prominent place: this will help you completely concentrate on the main thing, not paying attention to small things.

This approach will help you re-discover all the opportunities you forgot about. For example, if your child is planned masquerade, but you cannot afford to purchase a dear suit, remember your talents, old hobbies and hobbies. Perhaps, in childhood, you were fond of sewing, appliqués, invented various outfits or just loved to draw? If so, then you feel free to achieve for the work: Of course, it is likely that you have forgotten any details, but your main hands will certainly remember. If you did not find such talents from you, do not despair: you can apply your communication skills and attract a girlfriend, sister or neighbor to create a masquerade costume: In return, you can offer your help in what you know.

Step 4: Determine what you you can not make to solve the problem

At first glance, the useless point is still worth performing: in order to understand what you really should not worry. Not everyone is subject to us, however
Very often, people still worry due to what they do not affect the power - such torments are not only useless, but even harmful. Hardly you need to worry about what your departure is delayed due to faults in the engine of the aircraft: you are not an aircraft, so? If you are experiencing frequently, read our article: Tips from it will help you stop worrying for every matter. Decide on what you can not affect, at least for your own calm. Think who besides you can influence the problem, but without fanatism: if you have problems with finance, you should not hope for the existence of a rich millionaire's rich uncle, who burns the desire to leave you a huge legacy.

Step 5: Make an action plan, choose a way and solve the problem

Most of the problems need to be solved in a clear sequence, so you will probably need to make an accurate action plan. In addition, it is worth accustomed to perceive the problem not as an irresistible difficulty, but as a task you want to decide: so you facilitate a job a little, since the psychologically "task" is perceived less painful than the "problem".

At first glance, ways to solve any problem can be a great set, but there are only four main main. So you can:

1. Change your actions. For an example, take a case with a masquerade suit: a holiday is scheduled in a week, and you do not have money for a suit and will not appear in the near future. If your usual actions - once again take money, you should change a little tactics. For example, you can, as already mentioned, try to make a suit on your own or ask for help from other people. As a result, you get a suit one way or another, the child goes to Masquerade, the problem is solved.

2. Avoid the situation.In the case of a suit, this approach can be expressed as follows: you declare that you have no money for a suit, so in the masquerade child will not participate. As the money on the costume allocate no longer needed, for you the problem is solved, but for a child - hardly. This is the most radical method, and it is not suitable for all situations.

3. Change the situation. This is a more flexible solution to the problem than the previous one. Considering the same case with a party suit, you can offer your child instead of a costume holiday visit a free exhibition or arrange a family picnic on weekends. The problem will be solved if you show maximum flexibility and you can choose a correct decision that will suit everyone (if your problem concerns someone else except you). If you are limited in time, our advice will help you quickly choose the right solution.

4. Different with a different situation. Compromise option. In this case, it is proposed to change its vision of the current situation: in fact, you solve the problem within yourself, without affecting what is happening. In the case of a masquerade and costume, you can respen with the fact that the acquisition of the outfit will have to spend a certain amount, get the right amount of money and no longer remember this problem. It is likely that many such a solution will seem strange and even ineffective, but it is great for cases when you really can't change the situation, or the problem is just in your thoughts in which you need to clean up.

Buddhist monks known for their wisdom about the problems in a person's life say: "Who can know that there is bad luck, and what is luck?"

If a few minutes distract from the strings of business and worries and look around, it can be noted that in our environment there are always two categories of people. One turns out everything for whatever they fell, while others are constantly concerned about how to solve the problem arising in one, then in another sphere of their lives.

The problem is a message from the Universe

We dream of the day when there will be no problem in our life. From their quantity, it seems, you can go crazy. Problems in the family, in business, with children, health problems ... Where to find a way out of this carousel, how to deal with the life of the lifetimes that fate sends?

And you don't need to fight at all, as well as avoid such situations. Everything that happens in our life does not happen just like that. In this form, the universe sends us encoded signs that are designed to ask themselves:

  • What part of my life affected this situation?
  • What are my actions could be the root of these troubles?
  • About my thoughts?
  • About my lifestyle?
  • On an alternative way, according to which it would be worth going?
The most important thing is that it is impossible to do in any case, if you need to find a way out of a difficult situation - do not regret yourself and not to lower your hands. If you do it, then miss the most important message that is intended exclusively for you.

We write the "problem" - mean "opportunities"

Want to know how strong people solve problems? They believe in themselves and in any situation are looking for opportunities, and they believe, there is always.

My girlfriend was in a very difficult position when she threw a civilian husband. The situation is banal before the disgrace: the rival was more attractive than the bored woman, fully dedicated himself to the family and their two common children.

Elena remained without money, without profession, without the slightest prospects even for tomorrow. Do not go crazy only the fact that children demanded attention and care. It was impossible to cry with them, because then quiet tears turned into a friendly choir of bored soloists.

Having said to himself that every problem is only a favorable case, Elena found a way out of a predicament.

She thought over her life and understood: in his family, and in her family her parents always had to be dependent. She was constantly said that she should do and how to enroll in a particular situation.

Soft and indecisive Elena had a strongly understated self-esteem. She promised himself that for the sake of children, be sure to firmly stand on his feet and acquire confidence.

During the forced seat of the house, even in the "former" life, Elena learned to make amazing flowers for beauty, marked with impeccable taste. Friends and acquaintances always asked her to help with the design of family holidays.

Now Lena decided to get a simple working in the flower shop. In parallel, she persistently worked on their views on life, over self-esteem. Now my girlfriend is a small mistress, but firmly standing on the feet of flower businesses, and its design abilities apply not only on home holidays and are very well paid.

Happiness in his personal life did not make himself wait, the husband of Elena is a very kind and soft-hearted person, mutual understanding reigns in their family. Now my girlfriend gives advice on how strong people solve problems.

Who managed to overcome the problem

The famous American brain power researcher John Kekho leads in his books a sample of how different people's situations are treated:
  • US President Franklin D. Arravel, without the opportunity to do without a wheelchair, brought the country from the "Great Depression". He could not even sit on his own, as she suffered from paraplegia.
  • Prime Minister of Australia Bob Hawk, who has been four deadlines in his post, was forced to fight alcohol addiction.
  • The champion of the Olympic Games Willm Rudolph, not only was born in a very poor Negro family, and at 10 years he suffered from poliomyelitis. Willma seemed to be crazy, so reality was unfair to her. Belief in the best and optimism took their own, and the girl won three golden Olympic medals.
  • The famous Runcher of the Ninetie Gail Devres a few weeks before his speech at the Olympics in Barcelona suddenly covered with terrible ulcers from head to feet. After long searches, the reason it turned out that this is a rare disease that threatened the girl amputation of the feet.

    Gale decided to fight to the end, and a couple of days before the appointed operation, the disease suddenly retreated. The girl won the Stater Snow on Games in Spain, and four years later became the Olympic champion in Atlanta.

In all these examples, strong people are solved, there is one common. They all believed that these troubles made them only stronger and somewhere even better than they could be.

If you think well, everyone can find a lot of such examples in your family or in the nearest environment, among colleagues and acquaintances.

How to find the cause of the problem

It's not difficult to get away from the wrong problems at all, as they say, "the bad thing is not cunning." But find a way out of a difficult situation, you can find the cause of failures if you use a specific search algorithm.
  1. Everything has already happened and the problem is obvious.
  2. Ask yourself about what preceded this which events happened shortly before her appearance, remember your thoughts and words.

    Do you know that thoughts, this product of our mind may include a situation of failure not only in your own life, but also in the life of people close to you? Negative emotions and thoughts, even carefully disguised, attract negative consequences.

    If only harmonious thoughts are in your mind that your world cares about you, you love it, and power next to you will always protect from unwanted impact, it will be the best protection against trouble.

  3. Ask yourself, the first time the problem occurred in this area of \u200b\u200blife. If such troubles already arose, it means that the Universe persistently tries to reach you, exacerbating the situation and offering more and more difficult options each time. Exit only one - react, look for a solution to the problem.
  4. Try to understand what the general is in all these situations that they are united. If you lose money all the time, then the problem is in your wrong attitude to them. If you constantly have a relationship with women (colleagues, relatives, friends), it means that everything is in your attitude towards them.
  5. Remember that during such problem situations, people talk about you that you do not like. These words - and there is the very root of the problem you need to find. No one invites you to go crazy and trustfully to listen to your opponents. But, if you are outraged, dump blame for someone else, it means that all the words have been said in other words - the truth.
  6. Ask yourself that you should understand for yourself from this situation, how do you not take people around the world, and perhaps yourself.
And when everything becomes clearer, it remains only to change the attitude of your mind, reason to some things, look at the world at a different angle, and try to get away from a laughed path, turning

The black strip can be a take-off

From time to time we are all faced with problems. Sometimes some situations and circumstances seem hopeless to us. I want to run away, close, forget everything happened. But is it worth it?

After all, then the lesson will repeat again. There is another way to go into the problem, think about her day and night, pour tears, pour it, drink or otk, in general, to disguise anything. And find the guilty!

Complaints on the problem and the search for guilt also only take our strength and energy and will lead from solving the problem.

It is also important to remember that the more we resist, the more the situation will be injected and complicated.

You need to find a way out! And it is better not one. As they say, of any hopeless situation there are at least three favorable outputs.

What ways there are ways to solve problems, and how to choose the most suitable, and maybe combine them?

1. Side view.

This method assumes an independent search for information. In all his history, a person has found a great set of problems. And the results of their decisions, he fixed on material carriers: papyrus, paper, stone, computer.

When solving the problem, it is advisable, first of all, to refer to the sources of infinite information.

2. Contact a specialist.

We live in society, thousands of people surround us, each of whom is an expert in some kind of area. Psychologist, tarologist, astrologer, coach, psychic, there are even specialists to solve problems.

Specialist in solving "problems in general" differs from them only what works with problems that require no extensive knowledge and great experience in a narrow area, but only intelligence, accuracy, common sense, some basic ideas, overall skill work with problems And, of course, inspiration.

Undoubtedly, someone has already come across the problem. Most likely, they were already solved by someone, and many times.

The work of the professional saves your time and nerves, but a good professional is expensive, and dependence on a psychologist, when a person did not solve his problems, does not decide.



3. Ask for the help of people close to you.

This method of solving problems is one of the most traditional. The way is quite reliable, as these are people, communicating with which gives you pleasure. Often such communication can calm down, give support.

Tell your family, friends, people who you really trust. They will always be ready to help the Council, the case. It is much better than drowning in negative thoughts and experiences.

This is a good opportunity to get a "side view." The main thing is not to be annoying and always be ready to provide such assistance.

4. Change focus.

Often we are too close and too emotionally involved in the problem to see and evaluate it with a good perspective. Try to look at the problem as a third-party observer. With a broader review you will see more features.

Often we think about the problem, savor it in the brain, focused on it, but it is not solved. We are trying to solve the mind, drowning intuition. So that it is decided, it is necessary to remove attention from the problem, remove importance.

The contents of the automatic writing are very often drawings, incomprehensible signs, circles and, of course, texts.

You only have to write everything that comes to mind. It is necessary to do it from 20 minutes to an hour. The main meaning and purpose of the automatic writing process is to surrender sensations you perceive.

Understanding the problem and exit from it will come in the letter itself.

6. Hooponopono.

Hoooponopono is an ancient Hawaiian art of solving problems. Translated from the Hawaiian language, the word "Hooponopono" means "to correct the error" or "place everything in places." There are four statements that you must repeat again and again, non-stop:

"I'm sorry".

"Please forgive me".

"I love you".

"Thank you".

If you do not like something in another person, it means that it is in you. Your task is to get rid of it. When you succeed, another person will also change.

When you apply a hooponopono, you do not clean the person, a place or event, but neutralize energy associated with this person, a place or event. The advantage of this method is that everything happens inside you, the mediator is not needed.



7. Arrangements.

This method is designed by the German psychotherapist Berthe Hellinger. The arrangement is an efficient method that allows you to easily and clearly define the problem.

With this method, it is possible to detect the reasons that attribute a person to a certain system of relations, limit the freedom of action and make it difficult for personal development, preventing it from building their own life.

With the help of the arrangement, you can analyze what is happening with you, find an effective solution in your situation and

8. Reincarnation.

« If there is a problem, it is necessary to immerse deep into it. Then you either find the treasure if it is there at all, or you will find one emptiness there. In both cases you will hurt.

Finding the treasure, you naturally get rich. Finding emptiness, you commit all this"This is Osho as if reincarnation.

It is immersion that this method assumes in his memories. There may not be other people's answers, ready-made solutions. Reincarnation is looking for the root of the problem, and through time and space. And then the case is for small - the solution.

Vladimir Zhikarentsev:

If we have enough forces to create a problem or illness in your life, therefore, we have the strength to solve this problem.

Remembering past lives You will understand that they coped with such a problem more than once, and if not, you are aware of what the result was the same approach that you have already used. Perhaps a repeating situation stretches not one life.

Often the problem, the block stores the resource, creative potential, then the treasure, finding which you will no longer be the same. And it does not matter where and when you left it, it is yours, and at any time you can use it.

All you need in order to take advantage of this method of solving problems are trust in yourself, a good conductor and the Internet.

Reincarnation also implies self-help, self-driving, which means that you yourself can become a specialist in solving problems and help others.

There is always a way out. And the most amazing thing is that he is known to you. You know how to solve the most difficult problem, how can you find a way out of the most difficult and confusing situation.

You can and need to learn from problems, create and detect those opportunities that otherwise would not be disclosed.

Every day you encounter various tasks and problems that require your attention and urgent decision. All of them are different and have different levels of significance and complexity. Simple tasks can be solved easily, without applying special knowledge, but you may not get to cope with serious problems without special advice. The use of such tips will help you not only solve the problem, but also save time and your efforts.

Here are some tips that will help solve any problems easier.

Understand the problem

Describe the essence of your problem in order to understand what exactly you are dealing with. Understand the problem is the same thing that the situation is or circumstance and needs to be solved. Think, perhaps your behavior or action caused this problem, only then you will know, and from what to repel.

Do not try to solve all the problems immediately

Many people are trying to solve all their problems right away, but it leads to their exacerbation. All your efforts can lead to burnout syndrome. Decide the problems alternately. If you focus your attention on one problem, you will have more chances for success in solving it.

You prevent you from your fear

Often, precisely fear prevents us to solve this or that problem. And the path here is one, move contrary to your fear. You can overcome it only passing through it. Try less to think about the problem in a bad key, that is, that something you can not work out or you will look unsuitable in the process of solving the problem. Think with accuracy yes, on the contrary, you solved the problem successfully and everything turned out. Positive mood is half success

Create a plan

The plan is very important in solving any tasks, including in solving problems. Make a detailed action plan for solving a certain problem. Thus, the problem may seem not so complicated, which will also reduce your fear of it and speed up the solution to the problem.

Use other people's experience

Tell someone about your problem or better look for a decision on the Internet. All problems are usually similar and for sure and someone has already come across yours. For this, someone has a lot of services by type questions-answer, but it is better to simply use the search engine, it will tell you the best solutions, if any.

Calm down

Emotional solutions are usually destructive and erroneous. Remember that the more you are upset, the more difficult it will be to find the right decision and do not make even more mistakes. Just forget about your problems for a while, until the normalization of the emotional state, try to relax and distract to something positive.

Ask for help

Do not forget about your loved ones and friends. They will always help and support you in a difficult situation and it will be much easier for you to solve problems together. Moreover, from the side, it is easier to find the best solution to the problem.

Avoid additional problems

Think about ways to use to solve your problem and their consequences. Very often, a solution to any problem can lead to even more problems. Analyze the ways to solve this or that problem to avoid the possible appearance of new ones.

Law of action

Just sit and wait for someone to solve your problems for you or they suddenly dissolve themselves, stupid. Thinking about the problem and make up different places is certainly good, but without action it is absolutely useless occupation. Just start doing something now and in no case delay important and urgent problems for later, it is only aggravating and strengthen the problem.

At the end, I would like to add that it is not necessary to emphasize on the word problem, replace the circumstance or a situation in the word or the situation in order not to cause negative emotions.