What can push the once caring and loving husband to beat his wife, bullying his family? Psychology reveals the reasons why a husband beats his wife, but the consequences are still disappointing, because it requires work with a family and personal psychologist. Of course, this is unlikely to end. Many women, after the husband raised his hand, forgive their spouse. Some husbands swear that the demon was beguiled and everything turned out by accident, others push everything off to stress and fatigue. But everyone always makes a promise that this will never happen again.

The woman believes the words spoken and forgets everything. Many begin to blame and scold themselves: "Why did I climb, because I knew that after work I was tired!" But forgiving once, everything repeats itself over and over again. No amount of fatigue or stress can justify the actions of the stronger sex. A woman cannot understand what this situation is hiding behind herself, therefore it is family psychology that reveals the true reasons why a husband beats his wife at home.

It happens that some women standing in front of a mirror with a bruise find an excuse for this - beats means loves. And again, the excuse could not calm, regret, or caress. The oath promise of her husband that this will not happen again is all a lie. Too small percentage of men realize their mistake and do not repeat it again in the future. Psychology, in the framework of sessions and work of a couple with a family psychologist, explains important reasons why a husband beats his wife, which is simply impossible to reach on your own. By hitting a woman once, a certain barrier is broken for the man that they were not punished.

Aggressive men who are able to raise their hand to their wives are divided into two types:

1. The first type of men includes people who themselves awaken the fire of rage. They throw sarcastic words, call names in order to offend and humiliate more, while turning themselves on more and more. In such families there are no friends, even with relatives they rarely communicate. And the wife, in turn, tries to think about her actions and words, so as not to anger her spouse once again.
2. The second type of men is cold-blooded men. Their reaction is so calm that they can beat their chosen one to a pulp without the slightest tremor and regret. However, nothing can stop them, not even pregnancy. Having finished the proceedings with his wife, this type of men transfers their negativity to those close to them. It is not uncommon for their own children to become them.

Psychology shows the reasons why a husband beats his wife:

It is not uncommon for a woman to provoke a man. By nature, female psychology is different in that they can be quickly pissed off. Some women throw tantrums, start calling names. There are also those who themselves begin to dissolve their hands. Adding oil to the fire, thereby provoking a fight.
Psychologists advise, before a woman gets married, to look at the groom's family. If the father beat the mother, then this pattern of behavior will go to the son. Even if in childhood the child was afraid and worried about his mother and promised in the future, not to do this with his family.
Alcoholism, the main cause of assault in the family. More often than not, cases of violence, trauma, and murder occur precisely in a drunken stupor. A person who drinks alcohol has a weak nervous system.
In order to raise your self-esteem and show superiority over others. If failures and humiliations occur outside the aisles of the house, then by spreading his hands on his wife, such a man finds satisfaction.
The boy, who was spoiled from childhood and followed all orders from the first "I want", will be a tyrant for the family. He will need his wife to fulfill all his conditions.
Women should think about the situation in their family. Is it worth forgiving a person who managed to raise his hand and hit. Moreover, if there are children in the family.

In this article we will talk about why a man beats a woman. After reading it to the end, you will learn the reasons for this behavior of a man, as well as how to avoid all this. Try to throw away emotions and then read everything that is written here.

The source of this article is, first of all, proven knowledge from the Scriptures, as well as the recommendations of modern sane psychologists.

It's not for nothing that I just said about what this article is based on. Under this article you can find comments in which women angrily accuse the author of the article (i.e. me) that apparently I myself beat or beat women.

This makes me smile, but at the same time regrets that women do not want to understand this article deeply, but are guided by personal experience or the experience of friends, relatives. But the fact is that our experience is usually a pitiful sight, and you need to be a very exalted person to rely on your experience in such a matter.

Also, especially for dear readers, a number of videos of famous lecturers and psychologists on this topic have been added. I want to start this article with the following:

Of course, women are gentle creatures that we, men, must cherish and protect. And there is no excuse for a man who raises his hand against a woman. This means that he is a weak, underdeveloped personality.

But there are certain reasons for these situations, which most often arise in modern society. There are three main reasons why a man begins to raise his hand against a woman.

Why does a man raise his hand to a woman?

A man hits a woman if she doesn't respect herself

There are situations when a woman worships a man and runs in front of him "on her hind legs." This usually happens if the man is very rich or very handsome.

The existence of such a situation means that the woman has no self-esteem. The man feels and sees it. First, he starts torturing her in bed. Perverted brutal sex from this opera. The woman suffers greatly from this, but does nothing and considers it normal.

If a woman does nothing about this situation, then the man begins to mock her not only in bed, but also in life. Hit her, etc. In the end, he leaves her and finds himself a friend of a woman who will not allow him to do this and will show him how to live correctly.

A man beats a woman if she does not yield to him and destroys him mentally

A very common situation is when a woman always insists on her own. In any matter, she is not inferior to a man and begins to argue with him, as well as prove her innocence.

This behavior of a woman drives a man crazy, since the female psyche is several times stronger than the male psyche. As a result, a man beats a woman or breaks down mentally (starts drinking, walking, etc.).

A woman should know this most common reason why a man beats a woman:

When she begins to argue with a man, he ceases to see her as a woman, but sees only his rival. The result is assault.

An exception is the situation if a man is reasonable and understands that his woman is stupid and condescending to her.

• A woman suffers from the assault of her husband under the influence of her fate

It happens that a woman's husbands come across such a monster who beats her, even though she behaves as befits an exalted respectable wife. This means only one thing - this is how fate acts, which punishes her for actions from the past (often from past lives).

In such situations, a man will definitely also be punished by fate for this when the time comes, but in this situation he is an instrument in the hands of fate.

Thus, it can be understood that the mistakes of a woman and her wrong behavior are often the cause of assault in the family. These words may sound as if I still justify or defend such men. To clarify this point, I recorded a video in which you will also hear general recommendations about male assault in relationships:

What to do when a man starts fighting a woman?

If a man starts to fight, then the woman has three options for how to behave. And the option that she chooses depends on what woman is according to the level of her consciousness, whether she is reasonable.

• Argue with a man and prove your rights

Often women do this, not suspecting that this further enrages the man. He is not that he will not calm down, he will be ready to kill her in a fit of rage, which is caused by her provocative behavior.

This type of behavior is chosen by stupid and unreasonable women who have no idea about the correct behavior of a woman. It is in such situations that domestic murders often occur.

• Get away from the man and put in place

If a man has entered a state in which he is ready to fight a woman, then the most correct thing to do is to distance himself from him. Immediately at the very moment, it is better to move away from him, for example, to a friend or mother, and wait until he calms down.

There is no need to prove to a man at this moment that he is wrong - it is useless. Moreover, you do not need to answer him - this will provoke an even greater conflict. If it is not possible to leave him in another place, then call a police-militia squad, let them take him to spend the night in a place suitable for such subjects.

By the way, the involvement of the internal affairs bodies, when there are no other options, has a very sobering effect on a man, his mind immediately turns on. Also, a woman needs to understand that she needs to study how to behave correctly with her husband and in the family in general (an article about harmonious relationships in the family can help in this).

• Use the most effective way to solve all problems: spiritual practice

Often people turn to God in the most difficult moments of life. And this is correct, because, in principle, for this, these moments happen in our life. It is a pity that in most cases we do not attach importance to spiritual development, and often even make fun of it. But in vain.

So with regards to the situation under discussion: spiritual practice is the wisest way to solve a problem. You need to start praying. Every morning, at least 1 hour, better 2. It is in prayer that you will understand how to be in your situation and what to do. This may take several months.

Conclusion about why a man beats a woman

In the article, I did not go into more detail about the reasons for the assault (for example, the husband is an alcoholic and beats a woman in a state of alcoholic intoxication) - these are all signs of a difficult family fate. The recipe here is the same: step back, engage in spiritual practice, involve law enforcement agencies, if necessary.

Once again, I will list the main points of the article that you need to remember once and for all in order to avoid fights in a relationship:

Why does a man beat a woman:

She does not respect herself and clings to him with all her might;

She constantly argues with him and does not yield to him;

This is how a difficult family fate works.

1. If the man raised his hand, the woman can:
2. Argue with him and prove your case (sad outcome);
3. Detach from him and educate (a wise choice);
4. Engage in spiritual practice (best choice).

Remember these points and treat them wisely.

For a deeper understanding of this topic, I added videos of personalities who, quite successfully and popularly, lecture on the topic of the relationship between a man and a woman. You should listen to them.

Video from Sergey Yakovlev (Satya das):

Video from Oleg Gennadievich Torsunov:

What to choose is up to you, but remember that, at least in 80-90% of cases, a woman who does not know how to behave correctly is to blame for assault in family and relationships. And also try to study the fact that by fate nothing unfair comes to us and everything is directed, first of all, to ensure that we begin to actively develop spiritually.

I am waiting for you in the comments, it seems to me that you have something to say.

Lots of women can ruin their lives by making the wrong choice, deceiving themselves. We will try to consider different situations and the best way out for them in order to help women find this difficult solution.

Often women in this case are tormented by questions: is this the right way out, is it the only one? Do I have to leave my husband, how to treat him, maybe I can still fix everything? Thoughts even reach the point that some women plead guilty to the behavior of their husbands, begin to look out, delve into relationships, look for their mistakes and mistakes, concluding that it was they who provoked the husband. And all because their consciousness cannot come to terms with the idea that the man they loved, who in their fantasies about the future was a knight, handsome and kind-hearted, suddenly shows such an attitude towards them ... All this, of course, is very sad, but to endure such antics later will be much sadder. You don't need a tyrant man. If he repeatedly allows himself to raise his hand on you, this indicates that the only way out here is to save himself. Because if he dares to raise his hand against you, then he will also have no trouble beating your unborn child, turning the life of your family into hell.

Think carefully, assess the situation. Do you want this? Sometimes it is better to take a step back towards a new life, because such a person can only be corrected by a miracle. His despotism and disrespect will have a detrimental effect on the psyche, both yours and your child.

Why does a man hit a woman in the head

Why does the husband beat his wife?

As the classic wrote, all happy families are equally happy, all unhappy ones are unhappy in their own way. However, one can argue with this quote from Anna Karenina: in misfortune, there are also enough templates. Domestic violence, especially in our country, is one of the most widespread. Why does a man beat his wife? Let's try to find the answer to this question - and then, you see, we will get to the solution of the problem.

During the wedding, you are sure that everything will be as wonderful as it was during the candy-bouquet period: "serenades under the window", SMS with or without reason, tender love and other delights. Alas, sometimes it is just a shiny package, and the product itself under it is of a completely different quality.

After the registry office, you notice that the man changes dramatically and demands unconditional obedience. Maybe patriarchy is in our blood, although in fact it has long been out of sync with modern realities.

We just got married, there were no questions: you could take care of yourself, worked or studied - in a word, you were a modern person. And now he abruptly changes course and says: “Stay at home, I’ll earn money for my family alone. But don't expect extra money - you will waste everything. Since you are my wife, get used to living at the level that I can provide. " This is the first stage, and at the next one you already ask yourself: if the husband beats, what to do?

You can immediately leave, but everything is not so simple. What if this love is the same, real. Or if you've already gotten pregnant? Yes, unfortunately, very few people can be surprised by the fact that the husband beats his pregnant wife. This picture is even scary to imagine, but even worse is the fact that due to her supposedly hopeless situation, the expectant mother endures and forgives again and again.

Why does the husband start raising his hand? Psychology assumes that no one lets go of their hands for no reason. Most likely there were alarms before.

Remember, even before the wedding, he abruptly grabbed you by the hand, or yelled, or maybe swung - was it? And then he apologized, promised that it would not happen again or something like that. Even then, you should have thought - do you need such love!

And here's another alarming signal: you met his parents and saw that yelling at each other in his family is in the order of things. Or is he from a single-parent family, where cuffs were the usual way of upbringing. Here it is worth thinking about the future three times - you can easily connect your life with a tyrant.

There is another common problem when the husband drinks and beats. What if your man loves to drink, and under the influence of alcohol, a seemingly decent, caring and good person becomes a hitter? There is only one way out - to stop drinking. Do not be afraid to put the question bluntly: either the drink or the family. Think about your future, about your children. After all, one day he can beat him so that nothing can be returned and changed.

But unfortunately, very few people manage to take measures in time and not bring their family to problems with assault. But if you didn't manage to think about it in time, and the tragedy has already happened? If your own husband beats, what to do? It is necessary to record the damage, and make copies of the medical examination. Do not be shy and write a statement to the police - how else to fight if you are weaker? If a man hits a woman, he should not go unpunished.

Of course, there are self-defense courses, but this is a rather dangerous path. You will not learn how to defend well in a few lessons, and by responding with blow for blow you will actually accept its rules of the game. In the heat of a fight, anything can happen, especially if unsuitable items are at hand. It can end in serious injury and even death - you can become both a victim and a murderer. In Russia, tens of thousands of people die in such domestic fights.

In our country, unfortunately, it is not customary to sympathize with women who have fallen under domestic tyranny.

Even few people delve into why the husband beats his wife. And women themselves often contribute to such an attitude, their diagnosis is the psychology of the victim. Say, since it hits, it means that it is its own fault, it deserves it. Of course you deserve it - if you allow yourself to be treated like that! Yes, there is a saying “if the seventh husband hits in the face, then it’s not the husband, but the face,” but not all women are to blame for everything themselves!

What explanations can be found if a guy hits a girl? The psychology here is simple, cave-like. He thinks something like this: "If I recognize a woman as equal, then I myself will become like a woman, I will stop being a man." In fact, of course, the opposite is true. A real man considers it beneath his dignity to raise a hand against those who are weaker - this is the path of cowards and scoundrels.

If your husband hits, the main thing is not to endure! Don't be afraid to confront your husband! After all, as soon as you start to endure, you join this game, from which it is almost impossible to get out. Usually this is for life - and an unhappy life. And maybe for a short time - in a fit of anger, but under a drunken hand anything can happen.

But the worst thing is that children can pay for such a woman's mistake! More recently, a tragic incident occurred: a quarrel ensued between a husband and wife, which grew into a fight. The son (a boy about 5 years old), seeing this, rushed to protect his mother, began to pull his father by the trouser leg. He pushed the child away in a fit of anger. The boy hit the battery and suffered an injury incompatible with life. The man was sent to prison. The woman was in intensive care.

But even if, thank God, everyone will remain alive, the crippled children's psyche will not allow living in harmony and happiness! Even if this game suits you personally, it traumatizes the child for life. He sees everything: fights and humiliation - and will repeat everything in his life. The daughter will turn into the same victim, the son - into a new tyrant. And you must break this vicious circle. Here and now. Instead of walking around with a bat and expecting to be pitied.

Why do women still get involved in this game? Why is it tolerated if the husband beats, the beatings are not recorded, and even in the hospital they say that they “just fell down”? Like Yesenin: "Never mind, I stumbled on a stone, it will all heal by tomorrow." Why?

Probably, many of us also wake up cave instincts. There are many such paradoxes in nature, opposites are drawn to each other. A good girl needs a bad boy, a one-woman woman is attracted by a Don Juan, give a "little fool" a little "know-how". We are looking for what we lack - and aggression can subconsciously pull us in.

In addition, this game also has white stripes. Many people like it when a man then apologizes and regrets - until the next beatings. Roughly like Ivan the Terrible, alternating repentance with executions. This is already such a ritual dance that even neighbors get used to. The brawler husband sometimes looks like an alcoholic husband (especially since these roles are often combined).

In the soft version, during the breaks, it turns into pure "gold": gentle, caring, attentive. And then rolls - and rushed. Maybe the moon is close, or Saturn is in the wrong house - who knows? But the male head turns off, muscles are used.

What if your family is on the verge of breaking up due to beatings?

1. Try to persuade your husband to go to a psychologist to figure out where the legs grow from. It is very difficult to solve the problem of assault without knowing the psychology of such behavior. If the problem comes from childhood, therapy will help you, and the marriage will be saved.
2. Set your boundaries! Tell him that if he once again allows himself to use force against you, you will do something that he will not like. For example, you move with your child to live with your mother. The main thing is that your threat really scares him, and you are ready to fulfill it. There is no need to threaten with divorce, if in reality you are not ready to say goodbye to him.
3. If neither the psychologist, nor the boundaries, nor the persuasion, nor the prayers helped, and you already understand that you did everything you could, leave without regret! There will certainly be those who will accuse you of being unwise (as a rule, this is the mother-in-law defending her son or the husband himself), they say, God endured, and told us; beats, it means he loves; you are the one to blame; I could not keep my family and much of that. Don't give in to this psychological pressure, don't listen to anyone.

Even if now these are not beatings with bruises, fractures and dislocations, but only "harmless" slaps and shocks against the wall, it is better to start acting! He will hit harder, and you will leave anyway! And only you can decide with what damage: with a scratch on the cheek, with broken ribs or with a tombstone!

You, your safety and your children are above all else. This safety is actually a male function! He must protect his family from all troubles. And if he is not what he does not protect, but creates these problems himself, your fault is not here and cannot be. Whatever the love, financial situation, turn around and leave. If he loves you, he will take measures to combat himself, and if not, then such a man is not needed. Your love is not enough for both of you!

The State Duma has adopted a new bill to decriminalize beatings in the family! That is, now, if your husband dismisses his hands, you fix all the injuries and file a statement with the police, your faithful will not be criminally liable! The state disclaims responsibility for the fact that 14 thousand women die annually at the hands of their spouses (and this is only official statistics)! This means that now, except for yourself, no one can influence the situation with the beating husband!

Why a man beats a woman: causes and consequences

Aggression in family relationships is not uncommon not only in Russia, but also in Western countries. Domestic violence statistics are very alarming: according to studies, every hour in our country one woman dies from male aggression. The reasons for the aggressive behavior of a man can be complexes, alcohol. However, most victims of domestic violence continue to live with the tyrant in the hopes of re-educating him.

When a person rips off anger and accumulated negativity on a weaker one, this indicates serious problems. The minimum is about the inability to properly throw out negative emotions, the maximum is about a mental disorder.

The main reasons why a man repeatedly raises his hand to a woman:

• A childhood spent in a hostile environment. Often a guy or a man acting as a "kitchen fighter" himself in childhood became a victim of aggression from his father or mother, or saw such a relationship between his parents. Therefore, he perceives the physical impact on a person as the only correct punishment. Anything can be a reason for assault: a broken plate, a tasteless dinner, jealousy, a bad mood. So a man demonstrates his dominance and at the same time "teaches" his wife how to live correctly.
• Alcohol, drugs. A person in an inadequate state can raise a hand against a woman. In such cases, when a man comes to his senses, he sincerely asks for forgiveness, repents, assures that he loves immensely. After a while, the whole situation repeats itself over and over again.
• Complexes, self-doubt. A man who does not know how to prove his dominance in a social environment, who experiences humiliation from others (work, friends), sometimes becomes a real domestic tyrant. From the outside, this person gives the impression of being soft and gentle. The mask of a respectable citizen breaks down in the family, and close people suffer from his rage and dissatisfaction in life.
• Sadism. This is a mental deviation, and in such situations the sadist will not even need a formal reason to "shake up". Such a man justifies himself by the fact that the woman herself forced him to raise his hand. A sadist will punish a woman with a fist, a belt, a telephone wire - and this will be done with enviable regularity.

Many outsiders believe that the victim is the cause of the violence. She allegedly gives him a reason for aggression: humiliates, insults, behaves inappropriately with other men. Psychology claims that this is not so: the same jealousy or words of insult can lead a man to an emotional breakdown, but if in a fit of uncontrollable rage he hit a woman at least once, then you should not justify such an act and leave him unpunished.

In no case should the situation be allowed to take its course and forgive even a single blow. And it doesn't matter if the man hits the woman lightly in the face or hard on the buttocks. If he did this as a punishment or as a result of a breakdown, this is a reason to think about further relationships.

Women who were once "taught a lesson" often justify the despot by blaming themselves or unfortunate circumstances. They forgive the man and do not understand that they are giving the green light to the exit of his future aggression.

The situation in which a man hit a woman and was immediately forgiven can repeat itself many times.

A woman who does not try to radically resolve the situation with assault dooms herself to an unenviable fate. If the "kitchen fighter" is hot with alcohol, her life is in real danger. In such situations, it is always worth remembering that at any moment the family tyrant will switch to other pets - animals, children, elderly parents. Justifying the man who beats her, the lady condemns her loved ones to suffering, primarily children. Even if a negligent husband does not touch them with a finger, a childhood spent in an atmosphere of aggression will leave a negative imprint on their future life.

Reasons why a woman forgives the man who beats her:

• Beats - it means he loves. One of the most incorrect popular statements. No amount of love will justify the physical impact on a loved one.
• Material dependence. The victim does not part with the aggressive spouse or roommate and forgives him due to the lack of money and their own housing. She has nowhere to go.
• "I'll re-educate him." A dangerous delusion that threatens to lead to a real tragedy. Women bind themselves by joint ties with a man who has previously "proven" himself from the aggressive side, in the hope that it will be with them that he will be different: good and kind. In 99 cases out of 100, the miraculous transformation of a "monster" into a person does not occur.
• Pity for the beloved man. One of the most common female self-deceptions that threatens to turn into chronic masochism. The victim, having received in full, begins to feel sorry for his tormentor, accusing himself of provocations. The more often such situations arise, the more the victim herself needs psychological help.

Psychologists, when talking about domestic violence, draw a clear line between a single physical impact and regular beatings. But even the only breakdown on a woman is a wake-up call that is worth listening to. In such a situation, you need to talk to your husband or loved one heart to heart, make it clear that by hitting a woman, he crosses the line, after which there will only be parting.

If a woman has a reliable "rear" in the form of good friends, a caring father or brothers, this will help calm down the raging aggressor. Sometimes it is enough just to threaten to tell about the situation to close men, and the home despot begins to comprehend his behavior.

When domestic violence has become not isolated, but occurs from time to time or regularly, you need to fight for your health and life and make a cardinal decision - to leave the aggressive roommate forever. No reason justifies the tyrant and the passive state of the victim. If the beatings in the family do not stop, it threatens to lead to a real tragedy and broken lives.

A man beats a woman: what to do?

They say that if he hits, it means he loves, but, in fact, this proverb sounds more like an excuse for those men who raise their hand to their girls. After all, even if you think logically, how can a person hurt the one he loves? And that's exactly what these guys do.

In fact, when a man hits a woman, this is not a manifestation of love, but a desire to lead someone, to make a puppet out of a person. Often, those who suffer from their complexes and lack of fulfillment raise a hand against women.

Such a man, choosing a woman for himself and falling in love with her, in fact, falls in love with the image that he invented for himself. In psychology, this is called the replacement of a real person with a teddy bear.

That is, the model of behavior of such a man resembles the behavior of a child who plays with a teddy bear. The kid sees in the bear a friend who does only what the child likes. He says good things, comes and goes when the child wants it. In childhood, this behavior is normal, but there are people who grow up, but still behave with loved ones like teddy bears.

When they see that the woman does not want to act and behave in accordance with the way that the man invented, they begin to get angry and irritated. This is the root cause of why men beat women.

A guy with a normal psyche and an adequate assessment of the world will not hit a woman, even if she really is to blame for something. The most he can do is push or slap him in the face of emotion. But, he will never beat a girl purposefully.

But the one who sees a teddy bear instead of a girl and wants the bear to continue to behave in accordance with that scenario, begins to show aggression and raise his hand to the woman. Such people are called despots. They live in their own distorted world, under the framework of which they try to fit everyone around, and especially the closest ones.

When a woman strikes up a relationship with a despotic man, initially, she may not even notice that he is just that. The fact is that despots show their nature only when they begin to fear losing someone. And, in the early stages of a relationship, there is no great attachment to a person, and, accordingly, this fear.

The fear of despots of losing someone is very different from the fear of an ordinary, fully adequate person. If a person without despotic inclinations fears for his loved ones, worrying about their health and life in general, then the despot does not care what will happen to the pseudo-beloved.

He just needs not to lose his teddy bear. If the bear turns into a real person, then sometimes it is better for the despot to destroy him altogether than to accept it. This is the main reason that a man beats a woman.

It seems to him that in this way he returns his beloved, who for some reason began to behave incorrectly. Often, despots who beat women say that the girls themselves are driving them. It seems to the despot that the woman is doing everything for evil, although, in fact, she simply ceases to behave in accordance with the image that he invented for her.

Very often, despots begin to beat women who for a certain time agreed with them in everything, and then, suddenly, began to express their opinion. In this case, the despot simply thinks that by beating a woman, he teaches her to live right and do the right thing. Although, in fact, he just wants her to be for him the image that he created, and to which, in principle, it is impossible to correspond.

When a woman contacts a despotic man, she must understand that such a person will not give her the opportunity to be who she wants. He will always try to destroy her opinion and suppress the ego, since for such a person only his vision of the world is normal and he either expels all dissent from his life, or they do everything so that a person simply becomes a copy. But, since it is far from always possible to use methods of violence with men, despots take out all their unfulfilled desires on women.

If a man hits, many girls endure. This absolutely must not be done. When a guy at least once in his life really raised his hand to a woman, then you should immediately think about what such a relationship will lead to next. And if a man also reads a woman, beating, and says that she is to blame for everything, that she brings him to such a state - these are clear signs that the guy is a despot.

In this case, the woman has two ways to solve this problem. The first is to leave. The second is to try to convince the man that he has some psychological disorders and he needs to fight it. It must be remembered that not all despots really understand what they are doing.

Some just have a distorted perception of reality and it seems to them that it is impossible to behave differently. But, if you try to explain to such a person what his problem is, he can start working on himself and change over time. Although, some need a lot of time for this, while others will never be able to cope.

Therefore, even if it was possible to reach the man, you should not immediately indulge yourself in hopes that everything will be fine. And yet, when a guy is tyrannical, even if you try to help him, it is worth doing it at a distance, since the outbursts of anger will continue in any case.

In order to understand why it is men who beat women, you need to know what happened to them in childhood. Often times, these guys grow out of boys who did not have enough love and care from their parents. Due to lack of attention, they cannot understand what normal interpersonal relationships should be and create them on their own.

But, often, such a child develops the wrong behavior patterns, and he creates his own fictional world, because he feels superfluous in the real one. When such a person grows up, he continues to invent characters and try to "glue" them to real people.

And, due to the fact that a living person cannot fit the template, the despot begins to get irritated, because it seems to him that a loved one is trying to destroy that ideal world in which the despot is good. The result of this is beatings.

If a woman comes across a man who beats her, she must understand that such a person is not mentally healthy. You need to realize that this behavior has never been and will not be normal and something urgently needs to be done about it. Or try to convey to him the fact that he needs psychological help. Or to leave such a person immediately, because without long-term work with a psychologist, he will not be able to change the model of behavior, and will continue to beat the person who seems to him beloved.

Relationship psychology: a man beats a woman

The pressing issue today is the question of what to do if a man raised his hand to his woman - the opinion of a psychologist on this topic is sometimes simply necessary in order to either save the marriage or not. The topic of our today's, it should be noted, is a very burning article - "Psychology of attitudes: a man beats a woman."

How should we relate to this? Throw it and run right away? Many forums are devoted to this issue, because everything is much easier when we judge it from the outside, but when we get this situation, we begin to doubt, ask ourselves questions ... How could this happen to me? How could he do this, and how should I react, what should I say to him? Is the only way out - to break off the relationship that has been built for so long? The opinion of a psychologist in cases where a guy raised his hand to a girl may be different depending on various factors. We will try to consider them and understand this situation. Indeed, in the psychology of relationships, when a man hits a woman is not a rare case, this problem worries many girls, whose guys sometimes behave extremely aggressively.

If a man raises his hand to his woman, the opinions of psychologists usually agree on one thing: first you need to understand the peculiarities of the situation itself, in the behavior of your husband, as well as in your personal one. The psychology of interpersonal relationships dictates an unspoken rule: do not rush into the pool with your head, but analyze his actions, make a perspective, what is the risk that this will continue?

Why do men beat women - the answer of a psychologist

If a man repeatedly hits you, his woman, whom he seems to love, and raising a hand for him is the norm, think about whether you need such a life, such a relationship? Do you want to constantly tolerate this behavior towards you? And most importantly - ask if you respect yourself, because the fact that in this case your husband does not respect you is certainly, because in such a situation he only respects himself! Think about whether you can live with a sadist, living in the knowledge that this behavior will repeat itself? After all, your life can turn into a nightmare, there is not even a question of love, tenderness, spiritual closeness ...

In this case, the question arises: what to do if the incident happened only once? If a man does not just “chronically” mock his chosen one, beats the woman, but simply seems to have broken loose from the chain, although this has not been observed before. How to react to this? Why does this happen? Why did the man do this?

Psychology is a science that is designed to describe, in particular, interpersonal relationships, in order to find the reasons for certain actions. In the case when a guy hits a girl not systematically, but as if in a frenzy, without visible preconditions, psychologists tend to explain this outbreak of aggression as follows. Negative emotions tend to accumulate in a person. Therefore, if there are too many of them, such a volume of negative energy must be thrown out in the same sharp, destructive way. Beat dishes, cut paper ... But sometimes the "eruption" of emotions can happen spontaneously, as if a man raised his hand to his woman, hit her. By this, he transfers his stress and negative experiences to the object that provoked them, so to speak, throws out anger at his wife, who caused her, removes the stress factor with his own weapon. But the whole difference and drama is that not every person can do this. When we perform certain actions, we are guided not only by our own desires, but also by the appropriate situation, and our behavior is governed by the norms of society's behavior, as well as the rules that we have created for ourselves, our priorities and faith, principles and character, which also affect actions. It follows from this that one man, no matter how angry he is, will not hit his wife for the reason that his psychology does not provide for such actions, for him it is very low, and the rules of his consciousness will not allow him to do this. The other, who puts a woman equal to himself, or even lower, is guided by a different upbringing, a different perception of reality, an attitude both to a woman and to things, in a critical situation he can do this.

The analysis of a woman's behavior in a given situation depends on her attitude to this fact, how she is ready to accept this behavior of her husband, whether she can forgive him. An even more important factor that should be guided in analyzing the situation is the behavior of the man immediately after the deed. If he realized the criticality of the situation, admitted his act as in an emotional breakdown, asks for forgiveness, realizes his inadequacy and promises not to do this in the future, you can forgive him, it even needs to be done, but not immediately. A man should not feel permissiveness and forgiveness, let him realize that he did wrong.

The opinion of a psychologist in a difficult situation, when a man beats his woman, is that it is necessary to act according to the situation, there is no one correct approach to it. But the ability to objectively assess the situation is a very difficult, difficult task, because a relationship is not only tenderness and kisses, it is also inevitable resentment and quarrels. You need to distinguish between a mistake and a mistake that is forgiven, from a constant pattern of behavior that can ruin your personal life. Think well about the consequences, analyze the situation and do as you see fit. If you are in doubt about what to do, whether you made the right choice, what situation yours belongs to, whether you are deceiving yourself, you can always turn to a psychologist or psychotherapist who will help you understand the situation and lead you to the most correct decision ...

What to do if a husband hits his wife

What to do when an affectionate and family-loving husband turns into a fist-swinging tyrant? If a man beats a weak and defenseless woman by nature, and even worse if a pregnant wife or small children, then this is already a reason for panic. Do not think that this is just stress and nerves. Once a man has raised his hand to a woman or a child, he will easily repeat the beating again. He stepped over the line of what was permitted.

Many wives forgive their husbands - monsters, even after severe beatings. They hide bruises under the eyes, bruises on the body, do not tell their relatives about the fact of domestic violence. The proverb that beats means that the husband loves ”is not an excuse for the tormentors. Remember, if a man loves his wife, he will never do it.

There are, of course, situations when a husband regrets that he hit his wife, realizes the gravity of his deed and repents. Perhaps he will not commit more such actions in life, but you should not unconditionally believe in it.

What kind of men need to be avoided

In family psychology, aggressive men are conventionally divided into two types:

A husband - a pit bull deliberately harasses his wife with the help of sarcastic statements, insults, in order to bring the situation to a boil and at the most convenient moment to rush at her. Such husbands will do this all the time. Families most often live in their own closed world, alone with their problems.

Husband - cobra is less common, behavior is almost impossible to predict. If "pit bulls" wait before attacking, then "cobras" attack unexpectedly. They don't care if the victim is alive. Cobra beats half to death with a cold expression on his face.

Aggressive husbands are dangerous not only for the second half, but for the whole family as a whole. If the wife stops responding to her husband's bullying, then he can change the object of his hatred. These can be relatives, children.

Why do husbands spread their hands?

Representatives of the fairer sex often provoke domestic fights themselves. They respond to insults, stinging, and assault in response to threats from their husbands. As in the case of the stronger sex, wives easily and quickly light up, get annoyed over trifles. But unlike men who fight for power in a fight, women have to fight for their lives.

Why, after all, does a man beat his beloved woman? The reasons lie in childhood or in previous relationships with women.

The most common case when a child adopts the behavior of adults. In this case, the boy adopts his father's behavior. If your husband's family has had situations of abuse, then their occurrence in your family is highly likely. As a boy, your husband might not want to become like his father and do such things, but on a subconscious level he remembered the model of the man's behavior in the family and does not know how to stop these actions.

A person with low self-esteem, an outcast in society, can take revenge on the family. Husband, "beaten down" at work, comes home and beats children and wife. So he is rehabilitated in his own eyes, through the humiliation of others.

Why wives are humiliated in the family

Fear of loneliness or hidden masochism? Why are wives willing to endure humiliation and abuse?

Can an adequate man hit a woman?

Remember: a real man will never raise his hand against a woman! The only exception can be situations when a man's life is threatened by a danger from a woman. Protecting your life and the lives of children is an instinct inherent in nature.

Many young people who have gone through female aggression are wondering why a girl beats a guy, because there must be some explanation for such negative behavior. Recently, actions of this kind are encountered more and more often. So it will be useful to find out the main reasons for the manifestation of such actions.

So what to do if a girl hits her boyfriend. Firstly, an adequate young man will never allow the manifestation of such actions on the part of his chosen one, just as he himself will never raise a hand against her under any circumstances. You will have to carefully monitor your own behavior, it is possible that the guy himself provokes outbursts of rage in his chosen one. There can be a great many reasons for this, the main one of which is still jealousy.

It is worth making sure that signs of attention are not shown in relation to other persons. Perhaps the girl was humiliated by some negative statement about her appearance, and her rival was praised by her beloved person in an impermissible way. Such behavior and comparisons are not in her favor, not a single representative of the weaker sex will forgive or tolerate, and this cannot be ignored.

Men need to be especially careful when it comes to past acquaintances with the opposite sex. Many girls are very jealous and do not tend to understand and forgive in this matter. The accumulated resentment can eventually spill over into a rage, which ends with attacks.

If a guy knows his girlfriend well and has real, strong feelings for her, and not a fleeting attraction, he will pay attention to changes in her behavior, to those grievances that she kept in the depths of her soul for a long time. So that the matter in the process of a quarrel does not end in a fight, all grievances and misunderstandings must be clarified immediately, they must not be given the opportunity to accumulate and hide, sooner or later it will end in a grandiose scandal.

Psychologists still cannot give an unambiguous answer to the question of why a girl beats her chosen one, which causes such attacks of aggression, because of which she forgets about tenderness and tact, turning into an angry fury. It is possible that mental health problems, hormonal disruption or some kind of disturbance of the nervous system play a significant role. But more often than not, it is simply bad upbringing and inability to restrain oneself that dominate. Of course, this situation is difficult to understand without knowing the character of the guy himself. It is possible that he himself is a provocateur of such actions or once raised a hand on her, so she has to defend herself against him in this way.

But there are girls who are unbalanced, spoiled and inadequate, and in this case, she can attack simply because of a bad mood or refusal to fulfill another whim, or even, sadly, having consumed a fair dose of alcohol. Of course, a respectable young man will immediately stop all relations with a person of this kind, since nothing good will ever come of her.

It also happens that at the beginning of acquaintance and even long meetings, the girl showed such a quiet and angelic character that it seems better not to find her. But some time passes, and she begins to raise her voice, and after that she completely throws herself with beatings. Probably, she just does not respect her boyfriend and knows that you can do whatever you want with him. If this happens, then the young man needs to raise his own self-esteem and behave in such cases strictly and calmly, with all his appearance making it clear that the relationship will end if this happens again. Of course, this applies to those cases if the guy is not to blame himself.

In any case, no matter how far the quarrel goes, giving the fists a go is the last thing. Of course, the first thing to do is as calmly as possible to understand the reasons for this behavior. If it is caused by some misunderstanding, it is imperative to explain yourself, to have a heart-to-heart talk, so that you never again descend to ridiculous fights from anyone's side.

In the article, I will tell you whether it is possible to beat women (your girlfriend, woman, etc.). In general, I decided to make the topic more global (which will give answers to many, many other questions). They drove.

Homo sapiens is a reasonable person (although, I would say - not completely intelligent), because we have an emotional instinctive component (which can overcome the mind).

In other words, an ANIMAL lives inside homo sapiens (us people)! In fact, this is a human being - ANIMAL! (by the way, the genes of humans and chimpanzees coincide by more than 99%). Think about it.

So, for the most part, among the absolute majority of people, the animal takes over the mind. Over a person. Understand? Emotions take over. The instinctive component prevails, not the mind. And where the animal always wins = low rank reigns. Everything. Dot.

In truly high-ranking personalities, the animal within itself = does not dominate. In high-ranking individuals, the superiority of reason prevails over the emotional instinctive component. But, nevertheless = even a high-ranking person is not rid of the animal within himself.

Understand that high rank differs from low rank (for this our topic) in that he is working on this process. Tries to be MORE intelligent and less emotional. Understand?

The problem is that what was laid down for millions of years (animal instincts), and they were laid for the survival of primates, cannot be forgotten in a couple of tens of thousands of years of the formation of an intelligent component.

What is a fight, beatings, beating, etc.?

This is the same animal manifestation. When a man hits a woman, he manifests the predominance of the animal over the mind. The manifestation of an instinctive component. Emotions. This is a low rank.

A high-ranking man knows how to control and suppress his emotional component. He knows how to suppress his animal instincts, suppress his emotions, his aggression, anger, negativity, hatred. He knows how to suppress his animal within himself. Yes, it is very, very difficult (because animal instincts have been forming for millions of years, and the mind has just begun to form for literally a couple of tens of thousands of years), but as I said earlier, high rank, as opposed to low rank = working on this process, trying to be MORE sensible and less emotional. That's all.

Drawing a conclusion on the article,

1. Beat a woman = show an animal inside yourself = it means you are of low rank. This means that the woman who is beaten is of the same low rank, for each creature has a pair, and they get what they are.

1.1. A man must learn to control the animal within himself. Develop a high-ranking personality, and try to be more reasonable and less emotional. On our topic, do not beat women ... I am already silent about animal instincts, this is banal not male behavior. If you really want to spank your woman - do it more exquisitely, during a hot, wild, stormy bitch 🙂

1.2. Woman = you yourself are to blame for the fact that next to you is who you are at the moment. And the point is not even that you yourself decided to be “like that” with him, but because you get exactly what you yourself are.

Hence the advice: pump yourself to a high-ranking level (the level of a worthy woman) so that you can be with a worthy man. After all, as I said, each creature has a pair, and they get what they themselves are. Do you want a really decent man? Be yourself a really worthy woman.

You will be a worthy woman yourself, a high-ranking woman = next to you there will be an equally worthy high-ranking man. Dot. It cannot be otherwise. It is a fact! That's all.

In the next article, I will tell you why girls love bad boys)). See you soon.

With SW, administrator.

Family abuse and assault is a sensitive topic. Many women, when faced with psychological aggression or physical violence from their beloved, try to hide this fact. However, hushing up such a serious problem will not lead to anything good. Why does a man insult and beat his woman: what is the psychology of a tyrant? Let's talk about this.

Your relationship with your beloved is harmonious, and you are sure that you have found true happiness, but suddenly the unexpected happens - instead of words of love, the partner begins to insult you, be rude and shout. Why did it happen? Relationship psychology is a complex science, in any situation there are nuances, but if a man offends a woman, then you definitely should not endure it. You need to find the reason for the change in his behavior and try to restore the former harmony. If you fail to do this, end the relationship, because insults and humiliation are often harbingers of assault. In addition, constant stress can provoke prolonged depression.

The psychology of the sexes is very different, so many women find it difficult to understand why a man insults his woman. In most cases, this is how the husband wants to establish himself at the expense of his wife. As a rule, the "house tyrant" cannot boast of significant achievements in life, but strives to be the "leader of the pack." Men with complexes psychologically try to "crush" his wife, attacks arise when the husband feels that his wife is in many ways superior to him. With the help of humiliation, a man tries to make his beloved insecure, to lower her self-esteem. This also happens when the gentleman is afraid of losing his companion.

Important! The psychology of a tyrant's actions can have many reasons, you need to think not about why a man humiliates and insults a woman, but how to solve this problem and whether it is worth holding on to this relationship at all.

There is no need to endure humiliation. Try to talk to your beloved, but if this does not work, leave. If psychological aggression is familiar to you firsthand, and a child is growing up in your family, then you need not look for an answer to the question of why a man yells at a woman, but urgently protect the baby from conflicts, psychology knows many cases when the situation repeats itself. That is, if a boy sees how his father regularly humiliates his mother, he can adopt this behavior in relation to his wife in the future. A girl from a family where her mother suffers humiliation often believes that this is the psychology of all representatives of the stronger sex, and the question does not even occur to her why a man is rude to a woman and whether it is right. Why spoil the life of yourself and your child?

A man beats a woman

"Hits means loves" - there is nothing more absurd than this famous phrase. The psychology of more than one generation of the fair sex was formed on this phrase, many still believe that if a man raised his hand to his woman, then there is nothing wrong with that. The victim can hear from acquaintances "It is her own fault", "Be patient" and many other things, so many girls hide the fact that the partner allows himself to be assaulted. This is an abnormal situation, in most cases the problem can only be solved by breaking off the relationship, but there are exceptions. For example, if a man does not beat a woman regularly, but only once raised his hand in a quarrel, being at the peak of emotions: female psychology is such that they are ready to forgive the misdeeds of their loved ones, if they have an explanation.

Important! Before you forgive a hit, slap or push, make sure that your partner is truly genuinely repentant and understands that such a situation cannot happen again a priori.

Relationship psychology describes many reasons why a man hits a woman. Assault, as a rule, is allowed by insecure, notorious representatives of the stronger sex, but sometimes successful men also “relieve irritation” in this way. If a boy saw domestic violence in childhood, then as an adult, he can copy the behavior of his father. Psychology cannot answer the question of why a man raises his hand against a woman when the origins of the problem lie in another area: for example, alcohol and drug addicts and persons with mental disorders are prone to assault.

Attention! At the dawn of a relationship with a partner, many girls allow him, as if in jest, to say hurtful words in his address, as a joke to demonstrate physical strength. This is a big mistake, the joke can develop into real aggression in the future.